Closer to Acceptance
Today is the first day I haven't had to be anywhere or do anything in 10 days. My first day without smokey eyes and eyeliner. Without makeup. And my first day sitting here just reading what I want to read for as long as I want to read. It's kind of nice. Actually, really nice. Of course, every single magazine I have a subscription to came while I was gone. I'm debating whether or not I should wait to read some of them until I leave for Boston on the 8th. That's a long flight, too. But it seems when I'm on the plane I always want to read something other than what I brought or do something else. Like sleep. Or talk.
My essay wasn't in the Times today like it was supposed to be. But that's okay. I figure it will show up sooner or later. And I have a lot to write in the meantime. While I was gone, I got a lovely rejection letter from this really cool literary journal that only covers the topic of food. In all of its guises. It's called Alimentum (www.alimentumjournal.com). I submitted my anorexia story. Yes, a little dark for the foodies. But I figured why not. The editor wrote a personal note telling me to try again. So he must have thought the same thing. They never write personal notes on the form letters. So I feel like I'm getting a bit closer to acceptance and further from outright rejection. Which in and of itself is slightly inspiring. Much like the following...
New York Magazine had a terrific and insightful article about happiness. These are my favorite statistics:
*A super abundance of choices is not a blessing but a recipe for madness. People either can't choose or are convinced they chose badly.
*People who seek out the best options in life are maximizers. And maximizers, in practically every study one can find, are far more miserable than people who are willing to make do.
*Money may not make people happy, but disparities in income make people miserable. So happiness is less a function of absolute income than of comparative income. And that's why cities such as New York (and LA!) make people unhappy because no matter how hard you try you can't help but see people who are doing better than you on a consistent basis as opposed to a rural area where people are more likely to have close to the same income and things.
*Human beings are terrible predictors of what will make them happy. That's why we think getting back together with our exes will make us happy.
*We're more apt to feel comfortable with mistakes we can't reverse than those we can.
*Married people are happier than those who are not. (40% of married Americans stated they were very happy while only 24% of unmarried Americans said the same).
*Smarter people aren't any happier but those who drink in moderation are.
*Attractive people are only slightly happier than unnattractive people.
*Being surrounded by friends and family is one of the most crucial determinants of our well-being.
*Two separate groups of men, when given colonoscopies, reported less discomfort if the instrument sat in place for a few seconds after the procedure, even though it prolonged the exam. The reason is that the final moment involved less pain. Apparently, we define and remember our experiences by their highs, lows and how they end.
*We can be victims of learned helplessness. In other words, we can become prisoners of our own habits or virtual shut-ins of our own minds-- so if we're led to believe for long enough that we can't escape or make things better, soon we begin to believe it and don't escape or do anything to change our situation when we can.
And in "Self" Magazine in an article on sex:
*82% of women reported the best sex of their lives was with someone they loved.
*67% of women say sex is better if they love their partners.
*94% of women would rather have storybook love and so-so sex than smoldering sex and tepid love.
*89% say they have better orgasms when they're sure of their partner's love for them.
So why do I like these statistics? Some because they make me laugh. And others because they make me feel a little bit more normal. But only a little.
My essay wasn't in the Times today like it was supposed to be. But that's okay. I figure it will show up sooner or later. And I have a lot to write in the meantime. While I was gone, I got a lovely rejection letter from this really cool literary journal that only covers the topic of food. In all of its guises. It's called Alimentum (www.alimentumjournal.com). I submitted my anorexia story. Yes, a little dark for the foodies. But I figured why not. The editor wrote a personal note telling me to try again. So he must have thought the same thing. They never write personal notes on the form letters. So I feel like I'm getting a bit closer to acceptance and further from outright rejection. Which in and of itself is slightly inspiring. Much like the following...
New York Magazine had a terrific and insightful article about happiness. These are my favorite statistics:
*A super abundance of choices is not a blessing but a recipe for madness. People either can't choose or are convinced they chose badly.
*People who seek out the best options in life are maximizers. And maximizers, in practically every study one can find, are far more miserable than people who are willing to make do.
*Money may not make people happy, but disparities in income make people miserable. So happiness is less a function of absolute income than of comparative income. And that's why cities such as New York (and LA!) make people unhappy because no matter how hard you try you can't help but see people who are doing better than you on a consistent basis as opposed to a rural area where people are more likely to have close to the same income and things.
*Human beings are terrible predictors of what will make them happy. That's why we think getting back together with our exes will make us happy.
*We're more apt to feel comfortable with mistakes we can't reverse than those we can.
*Married people are happier than those who are not. (40% of married Americans stated they were very happy while only 24% of unmarried Americans said the same).
*Smarter people aren't any happier but those who drink in moderation are.
*Attractive people are only slightly happier than unnattractive people.
*Being surrounded by friends and family is one of the most crucial determinants of our well-being.
*Two separate groups of men, when given colonoscopies, reported less discomfort if the instrument sat in place for a few seconds after the procedure, even though it prolonged the exam. The reason is that the final moment involved less pain. Apparently, we define and remember our experiences by their highs, lows and how they end.
*We can be victims of learned helplessness. In other words, we can become prisoners of our own habits or virtual shut-ins of our own minds-- so if we're led to believe for long enough that we can't escape or make things better, soon we begin to believe it and don't escape or do anything to change our situation when we can.
And in "Self" Magazine in an article on sex:
*82% of women reported the best sex of their lives was with someone they loved.
*67% of women say sex is better if they love their partners.
*94% of women would rather have storybook love and so-so sex than smoldering sex and tepid love.
*89% say they have better orgasms when they're sure of their partner's love for them.
So why do I like these statistics? Some because they make me laugh. And others because they make me feel a little bit more normal. But only a little.
posted by jodypwrites | 10:50 AM
1 Comments:
I particularly liked the quote about "learned helplessness."
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